By Rachel P. Langston
When my oldest child was 9 days old, I left him alone with my husband for about 5 hours. It is the smartest thing I have ever done as a parent!
I missed a single feeding; I carried a cell phone; and I was less than 10 minutes from our house the whole time. Although a little nervous, he was very willing to take care of the baby. He was (and is) very trainable regarding childcare. When I left the house, I was NOT worried about the baby. I made a decision then, that my husband was just as capable as I and that my time alone would be wasted if I spent it all thinking about them and worrying about how things were going. I had a phone and, if there was a problem, he would call.
I don’t remember exactly what I did for that length of time, but I remember the freedom and relief that flooded my brain when I was safely buckled into the car. In fact, I was so glad to NOT have to strap the baby in and out of the car seat that, maybe, I just got myself (and myself only) in and out of the car for awhile! I remember that I went to the mall and I am sure that I took a long time eating lunch somewhere.
When I returned home, it felt a little bittersweet. Motherhood met me at the door and my husband met me with a huge smile of relief! I know he was glad his “shift” was over. Or, at least, that another set of hands had shown up!
It was 2:30 in the afternoon. He was still dressed in his pajamas and bath robe. I didn’t comment but he said, “I am still wearing this; I have needed to go to the bathroom for 2 hours; I haven’t eaten anything; and I had to answer the door like this!” I don’t remember my exact response but it probably was not as sympathetic as my husband would have liked.
Later that evening, after he had eaten, bathed, dressed and gone to the bathroom (not necessarily in that order), he said, “I’ll never ask you where your day went or why you didn’t do something that you planned to do that day. Now, I understand.”
My son will be 6 next month and my husband has been true to his word. He has never questioned what did (or didn’t) get accomplished on the days that didn’t go according to plan. I have to confess, my only intent in leaving that day was to get out for a little while. I didn’t know that it would lay the groundwork for all the times since then that I have left my children in the totally capable and willing hands of their father. They are lucky to have him and so am I!
Copyright, RPL Communications, 2006
